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"Why
did they put that story in A5 instead of A4? I think
it would have flowed better."
"Margaret!
They're going to give me the details of that man wanted
in the downtown robbery. Get me a pen!"
"The
police want MY help in solving this crime? Cool!"
"One
person was slightly injured in that accident? Good thing
they had a helicopter there."
"To
hell with my 7:14 train! The news has a report on dangerous
puddings coming up that I won't want to miss!"
"That
thing that happened half a world away? I hope this local
newscast tells me if it could happen here."
"I'm
glad this news station knocked on that neighbor's door
next to where the shooting took place."
"Good
thing they ran that VO of people putting on seatbelts
during that seatbelt law story. I had no idea what seatbelts
looked like."
"Wait.
They have locators of the house where a stabbing was
yesterday that injured a 16 year-old male? Alright!"
"Hmmm...
they went: package, VO, package, SOT. Wouldn't it have
been so much better if they had gone: package, VO, SOT
package?"
"They're
leading with the same story at 5:30 as they did at 5?
Booooooring!"
"I'm
only going to watch the helicopter station from now
on."
"Surely
the helicopter is the ultimate sign of the greatest
news station."
"Oh,
they're LIVE at the State House. Well, alright then.
There was no way I was going to believe a pre-packaged
story about the budget."
"Can
they make the logo on the side of that helicopter a
little bigger?"
"No,
I HADN'T recalled that Action News first told me about
this story last week. Thanks for the reminder!"
"I'm
glad they referred to him as 'the Pontiff' on the second
reference and 'John Paul the Second' on the third reference.
I would have been bored if they just said 'The Pope.'"
"It's gonna snow/be hot/be very cold? I sure hope
they'll tell me what to do with my pets and elderly.
I have no idea."
"Wait!
Wait! What happened to the anchor I'm used to watching!
He's not there tonight! Is he dead? Oh, thank God...
he's on assignment."
"TEAM
Coverage? Now I'm watching!"
"Remind
me - can Halloween be dangerous for my kids?"
"Remind
me - should I wear sunscreen when I go out this summer?"
"Remind
me - are there benefits to drinking wine?"
"Remind
me - can I get an update on this crap tonight at 11
only on your station?"
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